The Adventures of Figaro Weaver

FIGARO: THE PSEUDO-FILMMAKER (In Four Acts)
filmmaker, actor, entrepreneur, film detective, savior, persona non grata in Hollywood. A legend, in his own mind

Figaro! (2001) - Part 1 of 2

Figaro! (2001) - Part 2 of 2

FIGARO! (2001): So who is Figaro Weaver? He is an independent film director, read pseudo-film director, who was never able to make a film on his own. He went to film school but considered it a waste of time. Still, Figaro felt he did not have to work his way from the bottom ranks to make it as a director - he felt his ambition was enough to solidify a status in Hollywood. The problem was that every studio turned down his screenplay, something called Zero which deals with family values. So, out of sheer desperation, he consulted famous Hollywood stars and directors, including Stanley Kubrick and Julianne Moore. Nobody paid Figaro much mind, not even another underground filmmaker named Mark Oliver (a colleague of mine from New Mexico). Figaro is known for having made thousands of calls to several actor's agencies, including Julianne Moore's whom he had endlessly requested an autograph from. One of several ridiculous rumors about Figaro was that he filmed Kubrick's death, as if anyone in the Kubrick family would have let this nutcase in their private home! Nevertheless, Figaro helped implement the theory that Kubrick was killed by the Illuminati since the late master filmmaker revealed so much about their secret societies in Eyes Wide Shut.

But then came the events which made Figaro Weaver infamous in Hollywood and beyond. Figaro organized a group of four actors, and an ex-Secret Service man, to become his Band of Brothers. This group would make films on the fly by stealing film and video equipment, and break every law in the process such as shooting without permits and so on. This included the kidnapping of actress Juliette Lewis caused by Figaro's own obsession with her acting and film work, and also caused by her refusal to have anything to do with him. The "Band of Brothers" kept Juliette in some abandoned house in the midwest (name of town has never been disclosed) and forced her to film scenes for Figaro's picture. Eventually, Juliette was freed while Figaro went to jail for several months. The film "Zero" becomes the most sought after film in history, though it only managed a screening at the Cannes Film Festival and was downloaded more times than any other online film. Figaro becomes a celebrity, while Juliette sued him and burned most of the existing film prints.

Juliette Lewis - the object of Figaro's kidnapping Figaro Weaver is a character I invented in early 2001. At around this time, I was interested in making a documentary of sorts but couldn't decide on what to subject to pursue. Suddenly, I came across this idea of a character inspired by Martin Scorsese's The King of Comedy and John Waters' Cecil B. Demented. It was too fascinating and outrageous to dismiss, the very nature of a character kidnapping someone like Juliette Lewis, thus I set out to make a mockumentary out of it. This story became the basis for the short film "Figaro!", which was shot in two weeks. Editing took about four weeks. I played Figaro and Juliette Lewis's performance was culled from film clips of her body of work.

The documentary structure of the film has Figaro sitting in an office with an iMac computer, crime books and a picture of Juliette in the background. He is interviewed by an unseen camera person, notably Jill Schoelen. All of it is shot on mini-DV format. There is also a trailer at the end for "Zero," the infamous Figaro Weaver production. My approach was to dwell into the differences between Hollywood films and independent films and show that, after the mid 90's and the Best Picture Oscar going to The English Patient, the differences became more vague and less apparent. You need to see underground films at festivals, including retrospectives of Kenneth Anger, Stan Brakhage, Richard Kern and John Cassevettes, to know the differences. That is the whole point of "Figaro!"

Cameos include: Juliette Lewis, Vincent D'Onofrio, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Stanley Kubrick. Actors include: Jerry Saravia, Mark Oliver, Peter Hurley.

Jill Schoelen is the interviewer of the first "Figaro" film, unseen and unheard, and is featured briefly in the sequel, "Figaro 2!, Indiana Jones 4!"

Figaro Weaver as Indiana Jones Figaro 2! Indiana Jones 4! (2003) Trailer
Film will be uploaded soon on Youtube
FIGARO 2, INDIANA JONES 4! (2003) - Figaro obtains a pirated DVD of "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade," which features deleted footage featuring an actress playing Leni Riefenstahl (footage was indeed shot but never shown). The disc case unfortunately has no disc. Thus, the sequel to "Figaro!" begins, as Figaro tell his tales to Jill Schoelen (former actress, now a documentary filmmaker) about how he tried to destroy Steven Spielberg's reputation when he got wind of an unfinished, secretive Indiana Jones film that featured Communist and anti-Communist propaganda. Spielberg never finished the film, but Figaro has every intention to finish it, using the same actors who reluctantly agree to star, except for Harrison Ford!

"Figaro 2" is intended as a satire on Hollywood and the never-ending desperation of making a new sequel to an established franchise. Most of the film centers on Figaro's interactions with the stars of the "Indy" films, and there is a brief recreation of the opening scenes in "Raiders of the Lost Ark."

 Considering I am a huge fan of Indy and that I have been thinking about and acting out moments from "Raiders" for twenty years, my dream of actually being that character finally came true. So it is me playing Figaro, playing Indiana Jones.

Cameos include: Jill Schoelen, Juliette Lewis, Karen Allen, Martin Scorsese, Julianne Moore, Harrison Ford, Kate Capshaw, Thora Birch, Carrie-Anne Moss, among others.

FIGARO VS. THE BLACK ANGEL (2004) - Based on Juliette Lewis's book, Figaro: The Kidnapping Film Geek. After failing to ruin Steven Spielberg's career (despite a deleted cameo in Indy IV), Figaro is vying to still make it as a filmmaker. Hollywood has shunned him, despite his celebrity status. Figaro resorts to the fringes of the independent film world, specifically trying to make a sequel to Desiree, a no-budget film by unknown filmmaker Jerry Saravia. Figaro intends to make it by incorporating elements from his screenplay Supermom, and fails miserably. So desperate to make it in the film world, he hears about a supposed snuff filmmaker (Michelle Barberi) and decides to make a legitimate documentary about it. The trouble is that this female snuff director had Juliette Lewis's brother killed in a car accident, which she filmed. Now Juliette wants revenge and learns of the filmmaker's hideout, an abandoned medical facility where the snuff films are supposedly made. Unfortunately, Juliette Lewis finds herself trapped in there and contacts Figaro to help rescue her.

This sequel is the first true film in the series, not a documentary. Figaro tells his story to Philip Baker Hall in a cafe rather than submitting to another interview in another documentary. The film is intended as homage to film noir and neo-noir, and is separated in two parts, the latter more serious in tone than the comical first-half. Thora Birch appears briefly as Figaro's sister, Layla.

Cameos include: Juliette Lewis, Jennifer Connelly, Dorothy Malone, Philip Baker Hall, Jennifer Aniston, Naomi Watts, Laura Elena Harring, Missy Crier, Carrie Anne-Moss, Russell Crowe, Amy Brenneman, Jorja Fox, Mark Pellegrino, Daniel Day-Lewis, Tom Cruise, Scarlett Johannson. Actors include: George Teeple, Michelle Barberi, Meghan Olson, Rich McNicholas, Michael Tammaro, Amber Miller, and others. Some of these people are friends of mine who appeared in the film, and the others are celebrities as featured in other films.


NEW: A new FIGARO film is being written after more than 7 years since the last one. Tentative title will be:

FIGARO AND THE KINGDOM OF LOST FILMS
aka
FIGARO AND THE WAR EAGLES OF 1939
aka
FIGARO VS. FIGARO

Figaro Weaver is now a film detective, finding lost, incomplete films such as "The War Eagles of 1939" and Jerry Lewis' "The Day The Clown Cried." Figaro works for the government to help find these films so they can archive them and keep them secured under lock and key to be sure they are never seen by any audience. He finds both films at an underground location in a secret society block of a university. He is able to get "War Eagles" but the Jerry Lewis films triggers an alarm. He runs from security.

More will be revealed, in addition I will post more videos of the films themselves. 2011 marks the tenth anniversary since I made the first Figaro film.

FAN CORRECTIONS WITH FIGARO WEAVER:

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